I have fought the good fight for long enough now. I started my pregnancy with dreams of being the perfect mom, loving every minute and having well-behaved children. I know that God threw me in this whirlwind of twins with post partum to show me that I had to rely on Him. I think that if I had only 1 child or twins without postpartum I would do just fine, rely on God less & definitely have less compassion for other women having issues. I do have my prescription for Zoloft if I need it, but I’m reaching out and asking for people’s help before I turn to meds. It took me awhile before I could admit that I need help. My husband & I talked about daycare, Mother’s Day Out, nannies and other options. For each family, the decision will have different outcomes & I don’t think lowly of the mom who uses a daycare. I wanted some type of help that would allow me to de-stress & learn mothering skills. After some prayer, I thought about a sweet friend that is wonderful with children. I asked her if she would come over for 3 days a week for 1-4 months. When she accepted a huge relief come over me and I could tell a difference right away. While an active toddler wielding a spoon on their own might not frighten some of you away, two strong-willed, never stopping twin boys that fling food through the air while you are helping the other twin had just about sent me over the edge. I lost count of how many times the boys would bang on the glass or touch the fireplace after I just told them “no touch.” My gracious friend has come in, watched the other boy while I disciplined the other, helps with teaching table skills and is a sounding board when I’m frustrated. Post partum goes away or lessens when your stress lessens so I’m hoping as we evaluate each month I can cut back on her help and continue feeling great. I am not a person that admits easily to needing help. I not a person that likes to give what should be my responsibilities over to others without criticizing the other person. By only God’s mercy and grace, I love her help. I don’t criticize her work or suggestions and I’ve picked up a few new parenting tricks as well. If I will remember in the future to gladly accept help and know that it is God’s provision for me and His design that we work in partnership.