I am an orange rhino. I am taking the Orange Rhino Challenge. Not the 30 day but the 365 day challenge.
Yesterday’s focus on Valentine’s love really got me thinking about what could I do to say I love you to my kids? Not yelling at them was my answer.
I’m here to admit that I’m a yeller, no screamer, at my kiddos. It’s not what I want to do. It’s not what I ever expected to do as a mom. But there it is. Judge me, identify with me or pray with me. Whatever you decide, I’ve decided that anger towards my children will not rule this household. I happened upon a great website about three weeks ago, it’s the theorangerhino.com site. This is a mom who challenged herself to no yelling at her kids for 365 days. She posts daily about her tactics and what she’s learning. Sometimes she does a group 30 day challenge and I’ve been waiting to join one if she does another one. Yesterday, after waiting every day for 3 weeks to see if she announces a new challenge group, I decided to just do it. I’m not going to change my whole way of dealing with the kids in just 30 days. It would be a start but not enough. I’m not expecting to be perfect. I’ve got to remember that when I do mess up, to keep going because any amount of less yelling is better than none. Orange Rhino has posted alternatives to yelling. I have printed that list and it’s now on my fridge so I can run to it when the urge to yell is overwhelming. During this next year, friends might laugh when I’m out and they see me beat my chest like a gorilla or another goofy anger diffuser. So if you live in the Dallas area, watch out, a crazy acting momma is about to be let loose. Why is this called orange rhino? Orange is a warm color. A rhinosaurus is a usually calm and tranquil animal but is highly agitated when something bothers her young. That describes me. I didn’t yell before I had kids. I’m basically a calm person but my children bring out the triggers that get me going. I am realizing slowly that my children are not out to get me. Most of the time when they are acting out they are struggling with how to get control of their emotions. Sounds just like me in this yelling area! I have a wonderful relationship with God. He is very patient with me. When I act out and are struggling with controlling my anger, envy, excitement and whatnot, He doesn’t yell, He doesn’t punish. He uses the Holy Spirit to guide me back and He says “You’re forgiven,” time after time after time. More times than I should need. So this journey of showing my kids the love of God’s forgiveness starts today. I hope to look at my life in one year and see how I’ve grown, see my kiddos reactions and see how my marriage improves all by changing one thing about me. A very hard thing to change, but still it’s only one thing to work on.
So my new identity, like many other women who have embarked on this road of change, is to be an orange rhino. Let the year of change and hard work begin. I’m looking forward to a great celebration next year!